Tastemaker

BRASILIA, Brazil — The mayor of a small Brazilian town has begun handing out free Viagra, spicing up the sex lives of dozens of elderly men and their partners.

"Since we started the free distribution of sexual stimulants, our elderly population changed. They're much happier," said Joao de Souza Luz, the mayor of Novo Santo Antonio, a small town in the central state of Mato Grosso.

Souza Luz said 68 men over the age of 60 had already signed up for the program, which was approved by the town's legislature and has been dubbed "Happy Penis," or "PintoAlegre" in Portuguese. -Reuters

MEGA-TASTING AT USQ WINES
My mouth just waters at the chance to taste over 100 different bottles of wine in a single afternoon. In honor of the upcoming holiday season, Union Square Wines is having their biggest tasting of the year today so stop by and give your palate a crash course in oenology.

Date: Saturday, November 18th
Time: 12:00pm - 6:00pm
Location: USQ Wines (140 4th Ave at 13th St)
Cost: Free

Jessica Delfino Is Sorry to Disturb You is an open "apology" for Jessica's dark, sometimes disturbing sense of humor. Described as "A cross between Redd Foxx and Jewel" by The Onion and called, "The Lower East Side's folkie queen of obscene" by The Village Voice, Jessica Delfino's style of comedy has offended, irritated, annoyed, bugged, boggled and even pissed off at least one person of every race, color and creed. So, Jessica has decided it's high time she set things right with the world. Showing examples of her offenses, the show features her dirtiest ditties, her most vulgar stand-up and her most outrageous short films, as well as some surprises, all of which she attempts to atone for. (Or not.) Come prepared to get all up in a tizzy.

On Theatermania.com

So it was rainy, windy, and very un-June-like on Saturday afternoon in Livingston Manor. But even so, the Trout Parade kicked so much ass! What really surprised me is how many people turned out to watch. Main Street was lined with kids and strollers and dogs and huge puppets and weird hooa-hoopers and three or four bands, including the Williamsburg Brooklyn's own celebrated Hungry Marching Band, and a trout puppet as big as a Chinese dragon, and fish hats and a someone dressed up as a giant purple sea snail! Wheee!

We missed the music in the bandstand on account of the rainclouds, and the line for funnel cakes was too long, but I am now determined to march in next year's Trout Parade. it really was the Mermaid Day Parade of the Catskills!

So the trees, the ferns, the vines... green green green, my friends! Summer is bursting thru the rocky seams of the Catskills in greens so vivid that my mouth was watering all weekend.

If you've got time next Saturday, and aren't tied to your Hamptons share, make your way upstate to the 3rd Annual Trout Parade in Livingston Manor, NY. Picturesque rural performance art at it's chaotic, adorable finest.

This town is undergoing a Woodstock-esque change right now. A few years ago, a bunch of artists decided to manhandle Main St., and the result is a fantastic coffee house, a righteous bookstore, a to-die-for mountain sports shop, a couple of galleries, and the delicious scent of progress. There's also a graceful dinner spot called Resort that features local farm produce, tasting menus, and the occasional musical performance.

The Daily News reported that "Katharine (Kerry) Close, an eighth-grader at the H.W. Mountz School in Spring Lake on the Jersey Shore, outspelled 274 other kids, rattling off "Urspache" to win the 2006 Scripps National Spelling Bee."

Unfortunately, The Daily News misspelled Urspache. It's Ursprache.

Apologies Lovely Friends! I was in the Catskills, having a little vacation relaxation. And I now feel like a hundred million bucks! Hope you all got away for Memorial Day, too. I'll be posting more later today, xoxox, Hil

Follow this LINK and print out a $15 gift certificate to use in the Shecky's Store on Broome St. between Wooster and West Broadway.

From the article on MSNBC:

A dolphin chooses its own name as an infant and uses it throughout its life.

"It seems like the animals hear what's around them, and then they make up their own whistle," Janik said. "They either develop something original ... or they base it on parts of the whistles around them."

Regardless of the method, the young dolphins want to make their call stand apart from the calls of their closest relatives. Communicating by sight is difficult underwater, so dolphins use these calls to let other dolphins know they're nearby. A dolphin will also call out its name if it's lost and distressed, hoping relatives will come to its aid.

Dolphins are some of the most talkative animals around, even though we don't know what they're saying.

"Their repertoire of calls probably numbers in the hundreds," Janik said. "Some of them are food calls, but for most of them we have no ideas what they're for."

Dolphins are probably conversing about stuff that's way over our heads. I mean, if they're wise enough as infants to name themselves, i can't even imagine the depth of their philosophical musings. I wonder if they're a little frustrated with us... hopefully, some compassionate dolphin will dumb-down their language and give us a clue.

Attention All Heavy Drinking Female Flight Attendants Looking To Pick Up Young Men:

Thursdays at the historic collegiate boozehall Town Tavern, ladies drink for "free" for 5 HOURS, 5-10pm ($10 cover). The cover is waived for "all nurses and flight attendants with proper employee I.D."

I love it when our hospital and airline support staff get to get wasted. And what a great way to "meet guys," get "picked up" by a Tween, and wake up in an NYU dormroom. Every boy deserves a drunken tussle with a cougar.

Town Tavern - Macdougal btwn 6th Ave and Bleeker

In honor of the more than 23,000 shrinks in NYC, the mayor has declared tomorrow, May 6th, Sigmund Freud Day. Tell all your neurotic friends (real and imaginary) to come out and play!

DWELL Home Sample Sale
476 Broome St. between Greene And Wooster
Sheet Sets $50-$70
Throw Pillows $5

Georgeous Fabrics. Insiders looting everything. Hurry.

Saturday, go to the Shecky's Shop on Broome between Wooster and West Broadway:

Pampering Experience
Saturday, May 6th
1pm to 4pm

Come sip some wine, unwind, and enjoy a mini-spa manicure with JUARA Skincare and Midas Nail & Spa. Plus, meet the founders of Juara Skincare – a stylishly luxurious line inspired by the beauty rituals and lush botanicals of Indonesia.

It's Cinco De Mayo! And for some reason, Bush held a Cinco De Mayo conference to encourage English... I don't know why he didn't then refer to the day as May 5th...

Well It's also Children's Day in Japan, so get out your fish flags and wave that carp like you just don't care! I happen to be lucky enough to have a string of Rainbow Fish to flutter this afternoon :)

The Nets advance! Rumsfeld is "heckled" with intelligent questions! It's 80 degrees and sunny! And it's friday!!

(If possible, leave work early and enjoy the afternoon. It's a good day to remember what it feels like to be satisfied.)

Posted today in Daily Candy's NYC Weekend Guide:

EAT
Chinatown Food Festival
What: One- and two-buck dishes from teahouses, cafes, and iconic dives.
Why: A lovely day for a little wok.
When: Sat., 1-6 p.m.
Where: Chinatown, Canal to Worth Sts., Bowery to Baxter Sts.

Tell all your trans-fat friends to have an eggroll.

The Japanese Garden is one of my favorite websites; take a minute to check it out and you'll understand. Sometimes just a glimpse of these gardens is all the break I need.

FAIRFIELD, Conn. - Residents of the neighborhood of Sunset Circle say they have been terrorized by a crazy cat named Lewis. Lewis for his part has been uniquely cited, personally issued a restraining order by the town's animal control officer.

"He looks like Felix the Cat and has six toes on each foot, each with a long claw," Janet Kettman, a neighbor said Monday. "They are formidable weapons."

The neighbors said those weapons, along with catlike stealth, have allowed Lewis to attack at least a half dozen people and ambush the Avon lady as she was getting out of her car.

Animal Control Officer Rachel Solveira placed a restraining order on him. It was the first time such an action was taken against a cat in Fairfield.

In effect, Lewis is under house arrest, forbidden to leave his home. -MSNBC

Good luck, Fairfield Avon Ladies! I have NEVER known a cat to respond well to words or concepts such as "forbidden." -Stabb

"Codeine... Bourbon..." -Tallulah Bankhead

Lake Chargoggagoggmanchauggagoggchaubunagungamaugg, Massachusetts
According to OldeWebster.com, "Chaubunagungamaugg (the last 18 letters of the name) means "Fishing Place at the Boundary. " Authorities have indicated that the development of the name to the present long form stems from the time Samuel Slater began his mills near the lake, which was nearer the Manchaug village. Hence the Indian designation Chargoggagoggmanchauggagogg meaning "Englishmen at Manchaug," came into use. Later they added their original Indian descriptive name, and the entire designation becomes "Englishmen at Manchaug at the Fishing Place at the Boundary" or, Chargoggagoggmanchauggagoggchaubunagungamaugg.

Llanfairpwllgwyngyllgogerychwyrndrobwllllantysiliogogogoch, Anglesey, Wales
The BBC says "The name translates as 'St Mary's church in the hollow of the white hazel near a rapid whirlpool and the church of St Tysilio of the red cave'. "

Fucking, Austria

Long Live Addwaita: Tortoise Dies at 250

The Associated Press

CALCUTTA, India - One of the world's oldest creatures, a giant tortoise believed to have been about 250 years old, has died in the Calcutta zoo where it spent more than half its long life.

Addwaita, which means "the one and only" in the local Bengali language, was one of four Aldabra tortoises brought to India by British sailors in the 18th century.

Zoo officials say he was a gift for Lord Robert Clive of the East India Company, who was instrumental in establishing British colonial rule in India, before he returned to England in 1767.

Long after the other three tortoises died, Addwaita continued to thrive, living in Clive's garden before being moved to the zoo in 1875.

"According to records in the zoo, the age of the giant tortoise, Addwaita, who died on Wednesday, would be 250 years approximately," said zoo director Subir Chowdhury.

That would have made him much older than the world's oldest documented living animal: Harriet, a 176-year-old Galapagos tortoise who lives at the Australia Zoo north of Brisbane, according to the zoo's Web site. She was taken from the island of Isla Santa Cruz by Charles Darwin in the 19th century.

Aldabra tortoises come from the Aldabra atoll in the Seychelle islands in the Indian Ocean, and often live to more than 100 years of age. Males can weigh up to 550 pounds.

Addwaita, the zoo's biggest attraction, had been unwell for the last few days, said local Forest Minister Jogesh Burman,

"We were keeping a watch on him. When the zoo keepers went to his enclosure on Wednesday they found him dead," Burman said.

MSNBC's The Scoop reports today that Kevin Federline is considering stripping for a living. Supposedly, if his big ol' rap career never takes off, K-Fed has decided to spend his working hours taking dollars from lascivious females. Ummm, isn't that what he's already doing? Perhaps he's trying to conceive enough children to create his own fan club. Although if he limits his nudie-ness to the stage, perhaps the world will be spared more fuits from his loins. - Stabb

A match may start a fire, but once the fire is burning, putting out the match won't stop it. -The Terminal Man, Michael Crichton

Welcome to Jonathan Gray and Hil Cato Stabb's Tastemaker Blog! If you are reading this, you are part of our beloved Tribe, a group of serious professionals who happen to enjoy interesting people, social gatherings and the finer things in life. Admission to this blog is by invitation-only.